Don’t Date a Divorcee

Hi guys, so I met someone recently at an Africats event who was moaning about the state of his lovelife and it inspired me to write this article. Now, everyone deserves another chance at love. A single relationship failure should not at all stop you from getting another shot at it and ultimately, getting another shot at finding your true love and happily ever after.

However, if you have not been married ever, and are taking interest in a divorced woman, or have failed so many times with single girls that you’re thinking your fate might be entwined with the once-married ones, maybe you should think about some things a bit thoroughly well. Good focus can be found through meditation with certain issues, check out the the Africats Method by going to:  http://africats.org/2013/02/africats-new-course-on-meditation-coming-soon/.

Here are some reasons why you shouldn’t date a divorcee:

To begin with she just came out of a very complicated relationship and in the midst of an even more complicated post-divorce battle. Can you seriously picture yourself being in the middle of a legal battle, custody battle, or a battle on sharing and splitting of assets and properties? These things can get REAL NASTY. If your lady of interest happens to be in one, you might want to take a step back and wait ‘til the smoke dies down.

Or maybe she has too many kids. In this day and age of fewer offspring, anything more than two children can be counted as too much. If you’re not ready for the commitment that is a buy-one-take-one, then you may want to rethink about dating them. Dating divorcees can get complicated because of the family that came before you. Before you get in too deep with their mother but you’re not ready to commit with her kids, then you shouldn’t really be poking around in their already complicated family life and walk away anytime.

It’s worth asking your self too is she might be seeing you as a rebound. Seriously, who wants to be a rebound? Exactly, no one. It is one of the most fruitless and selfish relationship moves and it only gets worse if you are on the losing aka the rebounded end of the relationship. Individuals who have just recently come out of their marriage are more vulnerable emotionally and may jump into relationships to get back at their exes. This is a total waste of their time and it hardly produces a good relationship. So if you think you’re going to be a rebound, don’t waste it.

Remember as well that she might still be suffering from the painful remnants of her past relationship. It’s normal to be traumatized especially if the relationship ended badly. If your divorcee date is in this exact situation, you might be in for more trouble that you’re willing to bargain for or live with. Everyone knows how difficult it is to live with the old emotional baggage of people especially in romantic relationships. If you see your date being in one, give her space, Give her enough time and space to move on without you clouding the picture. Try to prove to her that you are a better man than her past. Unless you want to live with the ghosts of her womanizing or physically abusive ex-husband, let her move on in peace.

If you don’t think she’s any of the above,  read Matthew Ganz’ answer on how to get a girl to like you. Everyone deserves a second, third, nth chance at loving again. But everyone deserves to have it at the right time. There’s nothing wrong with dating a divorcee; as long as they’ve fully moved on from their past relationship, they are ready to get into a new, better one.

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